Every year I wait for you … and you arrive with so many blessings – your presence and the memories you bring seem to carry me through the year…. endless days, sunkissed skin, wind in my hair and wander on my mind – but this year was different from most.
I found myself unable to feel your light, hidden beneath the surface, you were so close but your spirit was out of reach.
Unable to let go of Spring’s gloom to make space for you to bloom…. I was lost in my mind, wallowing in my wounds – but you see, you still blessed me Summer …. you blessed me with the opportunity to seek light from within myself, to make challenging changes and to view breakdowns as breakthroughs.
I’ve learnt I don’t need to hold on to people’s opinions or wear them throughout a day like an ugly outfit and I’ve learnt I don’t need to tame my inner or outer voice – that I’m free to cry, to express pain aswell as happiness, just like everyone else.
I’ve learnt to take action and not just simply sit around wishing and waiting for better days – but I’ve also learnt to practice patience, because sometimes important things in life just cannot be rushed…. and most importantly, I’ve learnt to fully trust in myself … and to carry myself wherever I need to be.
I’m still learning to cope with the fact that sometimes I don’t have all the answers, or even know exactly where I’m going…. and that’s ok – I’m learning it’s OK!
Recently I have begun to feel your light, if only right before you left.
So I’m sorry I couldn’t feel you sooner Summer… but I promise next year will be different.
I’m looking forward to the cosy embrace of Autumn and heading into the new season feeling more calm and inspired than I have felt in months 💗